Chapter 20
I’m sitting on the floor in front of a bookcase with a box filled with books in Matthew’s living room. I’m trying to figure out if I should arrange them by author’s names or by genre. He has
quite a selection of science fictions, biographies, autobiographies, histories, horrors, satires and anthologies.
“Hey,” he says, crouching next to me. His eyes right away train on my face. “Need help with that?” he asks.
“Yeah, I need help. Desperately. I have no clue how to put these books on this bookcase,” I tease him. I know he’s just looking at for an excuse to be close and talk to me. His cheeks flooded with color at my teasing. Awww…he’s blushing. My mate is so cute!
We just met and I already know how to handle him. I feel in control. This feels different. For so long things are out of my control in my life. I feel like I’m being swept up in a tornado with no control when I’m with Darius. With Darius, he’s the force. With Matthew, I’m that force.
Why am I still thinking about him? Shouldn’t I be cured of him once I found my mate? It’s so weird to feel something so strong for two guys. Both feel different.
“So, how would you like me to do this? By color? By size? What are these coloring books doing here? Do you like coloring?
Crayons or markers?” I ask.
His color deepens, but he laughs. He has a beautiful laugh.
“Neither. Elle gave me those as a birthday gift. She said I need to chill and claimed that coloring is just the right therapy for me.”
He sits next to me and we start to arrange the books together.
Conversation flows easily between us. Our hands touched and the heat and electricity zap up my arm. He pulls his hand away quickly and he looks surprised. As we continue to put the books away, I become aware of his gaze on me. Once in a while, I caught a bemused expression on his face.
“Are you done, Penny?” asks Mason. He’s been looking like something has crawled up his *ss all afternoon. “You told me this morning that you can’t stay too long.”
Go away, Mason! Just go away! “I’m just going to help a bit more, then I’ll go,” I frown up at him. He’d better not be a jerk again.
“I have somewhere to be. I have to leave soon,” he says.
“You can leave anytime you want. I drove a car here,
remember?” Duh!
“Yeah, how can I forget. You drove your friend’s Porsche,” he huffs, emphasizing the word friend. What the hell is wrong with him?
He spends the next ten minutes scowling. Then he walks out, banging the door behind him. Everyone stares at the door then turn to look at me and Matthew still sitting on the floor.
What is his problem??? Gosh, what a drama queen.
I turn my attention back to Matthew.
Maybe I should be thankful that my mate is a human. If he’s a werewolf, he would probably be all possessive and be counting the minutes when he could claim me already. With a human, he doesn’t really understand what’s going on. I think he’s terribly attracted to me and feel the pull, but doesn’t understand why.
The problem is, how do I break it to him eventually about what I really am? Not many humans are aware of the existence of werewolves, lycans, Fae and other creatures in this world. So many are oblivious to our existence and we’d like to keep it that way.
Everybody left around three pm. and I’m still here at
Matthew’s. He seems reluctant to let me go and I’m not too eager to leave. We mostly talk and stare at each other, then talk some more.
I found out that Matthew is 27 years old. He’s a history teacher at a high school. His parents are both teachers. His sister Elle, whom I met today is my age, 21. Elle goes to the same college as me though I never noticed her around school before. He has another younger sister Taylor, 18. Jaxson is his best friend since ninth grade.
He loves sports but doesn’t play any kind of sports himself. He likes reading and loves horror movies. His all time favorite movie is The Shining. His idea of a fun night is watching sports on tv with his buddies or staying home, watching movies or reading. He also loves fishing.
I don’t watch sports on tv, but I like exercising. I love to do fight and weapon training till I drop with exhaustion. I’m not a fan of horror movies. I sorta like reading, but sitting in one place for too long makes me restless. I like staying home watching movies, only when I have my friends around me and they make it fun. I love partying. Sitting in one spot, waiting for fish to take the bait would totally bore me to death. I told him I do like eating fish, though.
We’re almost the total opposite, but somehow it works. We complement each other and we never seem to run out of things to talk about. We just clicked.
A sudden thought occurs to me. “Matthew, I have to ask you something,” I tell him seriously.
“Okay,” he looks worried.
“Do you like fries?”
“What?”
“Do you like french fries?”
“Huh, yeah….I like fries,” he answers cautiously. “Is that a trick question?”
“Oh Phew!!! Good, coz I don’t know if I can be friends with people who don’t like fries,” I say. What a relief!
“Oh,” he looks confused for a second. Then he smiles and says,
“then I love fries!”
“Good, good..it’s not a deal breaker, but close enough,” I explain while looking at the time on my phone.
“I think I should go,” I slowly got to my feet.
“Uh…okay. You have somewhere to be now?” he rises to his feet.
“Not really, but I’ve been here long enough.”
“Okay…” he says slowly. “Oh, hey…since you’re not in a hurry to be somewhere, would you like to come with me for some ice-cream or something? I know this place that makes great Gelato.”
I smile and nod my head. I’m not ready to end my time with him.
Matthew whistles when he sees Caspian’s shiny red Porsche.
“Wow, sweet ride.”
“It’s not mine,” I reply.
He looks at me with questioning eyes, so I answer, “It belongs to a friend.”
I know he has more questions. I guess not many people let their friends drive their Porsches. Well, not many people are friends with a lycan Prince.
“He’s very generous to lend you his Porsche,” he says casually.
“Yeah, he’s okay,” I answer. I think he’s fishing for more information I’m not willing to give. I think I just confirmed his suspicion that this “friend” is a man.
The place that Matthew brought me to is simply called Gelato House. It really does make very good gelato. It almost rivaled the gelato I had in Rome while sitting at a table outside a café in Piazza San Lorenzo in Lucina. I was there with my lycan friends last Summer.
I also found out that Matthew and his family used to live just a town over where my pack is. They moved here when he was ten. I wonder if that means we could’ve met sooner had his family stayed where they were.
He’s just so easy to be around and adorable. His dark blue eyes seem so open and expressive.
I feel so giddy yet there’s a niggling feeling of guilt too. Darius.
I’m driving slowly, and the closer I get to home the stronger the sadness I feel in my chest and the guilt in the pit of my stomach. No, Penny. You’re stronger than this and you have a mate now. I don’t belong to him. I don’t belong to him. I don’t belong to him.
He made his choices. Mine is clear. I have to move on.
I guess it means it really is over between us. Would he go back to Polina? Maybe he’d go back to one of those lycan women who would jump at the chance to be with him. The thought of that makes me want to howl in rage and sadness. I want to
scratch their eyeballs out. All of them. Everything in me screams that he’s mine! How can I not be over him yet? Will I ever be over him?
This is not the way I imagined what would happen when I found my mate. I imagined being over the moon about it and forget all my feelings for Darius.
It’s almost six pm by the time I pull in the driveway. I told Genesis that I’ll be back around five when she texted me asking when I’m going to be home. Yikes! That was an hour ago.
“Hey, Beany! Where have you been? I’m starving!” says
Caspian as soon as he sees me.
Oh, no…they’ve been waiting for me to start dinner. Everybody is in the great room while I can hear Anya and another woman busy setting the table and getting the food out in the dining hall. I feel kinda guilty for being an hour later than I told them I’d be home. I’m also not that hungry from all the gelato that I had with Matthew earlier. I don’t have the heart to tell them that though.
“Sorry, I’m late. What’s for dinner? Smells good!” I say instead as I take my seat at the dinner table. I avoid looking at Darius.
Anya serves us lobster bisque soup for starter. The smell is awesome.
“So we’re planning to visit Asia on our next school holiday,” I hear Genesis announces enthusiastically as I spread the crisp white linen napkin on my lap. “We’ve done Europe and North
America, so why not Asia this time, right? What do you think Penny?”
I raise my chin up and meet seven pairs of eyes looking back at me. Obviously, they’ve discussed this while I was out.
“We’ll do Tokyo, Fuji-san, Kyoto, skiing in Hokkaido, Osaka, Seoul…oohh, oohh…Maldives,” rattles Genesis.
Usually, I would be excited about our trips, but this time I’m just conflicted. World trips with my lycan friends are usually exciting. Expect the unexpected. Lazarus and Constantine would opt for unchartered territories and adventures. Caspian would insist on travel in style and luxury. The best money could offer. Genesis, Serena and I would be up for anything.
Looking into their questioning eyes, I realized that I won’t be joining them on any more trips. I’ll be living in a human world.
We might move to live among the werewolves in my pack if my mate agrees.
They’re still waiting for my answer.
“Well, we can always go to other parts of the world if you don’t feel like doing Asia,” says Serena softly, mistaken my silence for disapproval of their choices.
“We could always go back to Monaco,” says Caspian with a grin. The others groan. Oh, we all know how much he enjoyed Monaco. He has a magnificent private estate facing the Mediterranean and a yacht in Monaco harbor, not to mention several gorgeous female lycan “friends” keeping him very occupied while we were there the last couple of times.
“Come on Beanie,” says Caspian, nudging my foot.
“I’ve found my mate,” I blurt out.
There’s a clang of a spoon hitting the bowl then the whole room suddenly goes silent.
My eyes automatically flash to Darius. He’s as still as a statue.
Seconds ticked by while nobody makes any sound.
“Who…what is he?” it’s surprisingly Lazarus who breaks the silence.
“A human,” I breathe. Why does he look so angry? “He’s a human.”
Caspian stands up and a big bowl of steaming soup flies across the room to smash against the natural stone wall. I cringe as the sound of splintering bowl reverberated through the house.
Then the whole table collapsed as he banged his fists against it with a roar. Fine china, crystal glasses, food, drinks, and cutlery slide down with an ear-splitting crashing sound. The thick creamy orange soup splattered on the wall, the pristine white table cloth, on us, spreading on the floor…everywhere.
“I’ll mark her myself,” Caspian growls furiously, taking a step in my direction. Oh no…
“She’s not yours to mark,” Darius hisses as he steps in threateningly front of the crazed looking Caspian. Both facing off each other, looking very intimidating. They’re staring each other down.
I gulp nervously, but I’m ready to jump in to stop them if they decide to fight. Getting in the middle of two fighting lycans would end up badly for me, but I don’t want either of them to get hurt.
Almost a full minute passed before Caspian finally steps back.
Before he stalks out, Caspian growls again and gives the massive crystal chandelier in the middle of the dining room a quick swipe. The gleaming crystal chandelier crashes into shards and splinters on top of the whole mess. Lazarus followed him out without another word right after.
Darius still doesn’t move a muscle. He’s not even looking at me. His nostril flares. His eyes as black as midnight. Cold and soulless. His body suddenly shakes and black veins around his eyes appear darker and snake further across his face, neck, and body and in a flash, he’s gone. Just gone. The wave of furious energy he radiated was so strong that if I was standing, I would’ve collapsed in a heap on the floor.
I take a deep shaky breath as I look around. The rest of us who are still sitting there look ridiculous. Sitting with napkins on our laps around a broken dining table…well, we’re sitting around a big mess now. Eva is still holding her soup spoon. I feel like laughing hysterically…or sobbing hysterically. I can’t decide which one yet.
Genesis sits there with a flushed face and a trembling lower lip.
Constantine’s face is taut. Genesis moves first. Pushing the chair back with a loud scraping sound, throwing her napkin on the floor, then she runs out. Constantine stalks out right after her.
The table is now cleared except for Serena and Eva. I feel sick.
Did my best friend just leave? A sob rises in my throat, but I swallow it down. This is not what I envisioned would happen when I announce that I’ve found my mate. I don’t know what I expected from Darius, but I didn’t expect this. Not from anybody.
Wow, I never thought I could clear up a room as quickly as announcing a mate. I don’t get it. I didn’t think everyone would be so pissed off about it. Why can’t they be happy for me? Why did they behave as if I just announced somebody just died instead of me found my mate?
Eva flashes me a sympathetic, yet puzzled look before she awkwardly excuses herself as well.
Serena sits there with an unreadable look on her face.
“Why?” I ask her. It takes her a while to answer my question.Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.
“We’re not mad at you. We weren’t expecting it. It was a shock to us. We accepted that you belonged to us. With us…for years,” she says. “We just need time to…to accept the
situation,” she adds. “I’m sorry,” she excuses herself and walks stiffly out.
It’s after midnight. I’m sitting on the lounge chair staring at the blue depth of the pool, hugging my knees to my chest. The house is awfully quiet. The house is normally quiet when everybody has gone to bed, but not quite like this. This quiet is deafening and suffocating.
Darius. I couldn’t forget how dangerous he looked tonight. Just thinking about him breaks my heart. I still want him. In my head, I still feel like I belong to him. I guess I’m so used to feeling that way, it’s hard to think otherwise. This connection that we have is so strong, at least on my part. Serena once told me that the lycans would feel it more than the werewolf, and the humans feel it even less so, but I doubt it. I doubt Darius feels the pull more than I do. If he did, he wouldn’t have done what he did and broke my heart.
The connection is strong, but I’ll be stronger. It’ll go away soon.
The closer I get to Matthew, the less my connection to Darius would be. One day it’ll just be a distant memory.
The rest of the lycans. They would come around, wouldn’t they? If they see how happy I am with Matthew, surely they’d be happy for me too? Matthew. I’m tempted to give him a call, but I don’t know him enough. It’s late, would it seem weird if I called him now? Would it scare him away?
I wake up on the lounge chair in the early hours of the morning with trails of dried tears on my face. My hair slightly damp from the dew. The house is still empty.
Nobody is at the breakfast table today. The whole house is completely quiet except for stiff-lipped Anya who poured me coffee and quietly placed a stack of pancakes in front of me.
My appetite has left me, just like everyone in this house. I take a sip of the coffee and leave the table.
This big ass mansion doesn’t feel like home without them in it.
It’s cold, empty, and grim.
I have a class with Lily, Amanda, and Keisha again this morning. I sit at my usual table. My pensive mood must be showing clearly on my face since nobody dares to say a word to me. Not even Amanda and Keisha have the nerve to piss me off yet today.
Mason is waiting for me just outside the lecture hall when I got out. I pretend not to see him as I walk past him, but he catches up to me.
“Hi, Penny.”
“I don’t know you.”
“Awww…Penny. Don’t be like that. I’ll buy you lunch,” he says.
That’s bribery, but I’ll take it. I think I’m just desperate for interactions…even with a jerk.
“So…you like Matthew, huh?”
“Really none of your business, Mason,” I feel my ire rise again.
“Okay, I know…but I thought you said you weren’t looking for a boyfriend? Why Matthew?”
“I wasn’t, but I like Matthew, okay? And why not Matthew?”
“Because. Matthew is just Matthew…you know? Girls don’t just
“like” Matthew like that.”
Well, too bad for them and good for me.
“He’s the last person I’d expect I’d lose a girl to,” he adds sourly.
“I’m not your girl, Mason.”
“Yeah,” he says. “Did Matthew tell you why he moved? Did he tell you about Cece?”
“Who’s Cece?”
His eyes light up. Oh uh..do I want to hear about this?
“Cece’s Matthew’s girlfriend. They’d been living together. They decided to take a break from each other. So, he moved out,” he explains.
“Okay, so that makes her his ex-girlfriend,” I say, shrugging my shoulders as if I didn’t care. I feel a pang of jealousy. I can’t help it, but then again Matthew is 27, so I can’t hold his past against him.
“Penny, they’ve been together since Sophomore year
university. They do this shit all the time. Over and over again.
Breaking up or taking a break from each other, then a few weeks, or a month or two later they’re back together.”
I take a deep breath. Why are things so complicated all the time? Why can’t things be easy for once? I’m too tired to deal with this kinda shitz now.
“I didn’t mean to upset you, but I thought you should know what you’re getting yourself into.”
I square my shoulders and straighten my back and decide.
Nope! Things are going to be different this time. I’m here now.
They’re not getting back together. Ever! He’s mine!